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Recent Movie Reviews

Madness Extinction Collab Madness Extinction Collab

Rated 2 / 5 stars

What could I say?

I usually didn't enjoy this, almost every part were very slow since there's only one good animator in the collab. The foots steps looked like grinding the shoes on the floor. The collab only runs slow, since the parts were made slow.

Madness Flageration IV Madness Flageration IV

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Pretty good

Some random person said you were a bitch and the his/her submission was just a frame of Madness 9.

DriftLV1 responds:

Oh it's you. Glad you finally like a submission of mine.

random shitt random shitt

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars

oh mah motherfucking god

What's with the flying shit and stuff? And what kind of animation would people ever see like this? You're blasting my eyes off. Don't you change the framerate? Just at least 30fps and you're set! And these aren't the kind of animations its supposed to be, more like flying everywhere, make them walk on the ground!

Recent Game Reviews

Mario Jeux Mario Jeux

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars

I'm really stunned by how this game....


Time to review another shitty game for the third time. My complaints about Mario Forever Flash and New Mario Flash are present here. My God..

Once again, I stress that the jump button is UP. Let me ask you, right now, has there been an official Mario game by Nintendo where UP is JUMP?!?!

Well, no run button, which means Mario cannot move any faster or slower. But for this game, he moves like a fatass slug the entire time.

And check out the victory music, that doesn't sounds like a Mario sountrack either.

I'm gonna talk about the setting of the game. What the hell happened? Does the game take place in goddamned Egypt now? Not even the environment blends with the 16-bit graphics.

Also, when the game tells you how many 1-UPs you have left, it won't be there long enough. It flashes for a split-second and goes away. Wouldn't this be one of the opportune times to rest your minds from the shitty factor of this game?

That's all I probably have to say for this game, fuckballs.

I'm not saying this to be a jerk, but these problems DO exist, and have caused nothing but trouble for me. Final words: DO NOT PLAY THIS GAME.

New Mario Flash New Mario Flash

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

Well, I've already reviewed Mario Forever Flash and suffered by the ASS it sucks. But now I've looked at this, I think it's worse.

Once again, my God, the controls are ruined. First off, who the hell uses UP to jump? That's still hard to get used to. Also, you can do the duck jump, but you can only do it with the keyboard, so if you're using a game controller, good luck. I dare you to press up and down at the same time with a game controller, because it's impossible.

Any other problem I mentioned in my Mario Forever Flash review is present, but the graphics bring a few more.

The graphics look bright and colorful, but I think the damned foreground graphics are gonna get in my way, and the background is gonna play with my eyes. It looks unappealing to mix 16-bit sprites with the flash-capable, bright colors and effects. Also, I find the life screen disturbing, where the game tells you your 1-UPs left. The picture of Mario makes me think that he'll take a shit all over the screen.

Also, you know those spinning nuclear waffles from SMB3? They made it in this game, but instead of that, they got replaced with green faces. I don't see the psychological meaning behind it.

Overall, it's the same crappy Mario Forever Flash game. I'm not saying this to be an asshole, but the details I've explained really are true.

Mario Forever Flash Mario Forever Flash

Rated 1 / 5 stars

I have played the downloadable Mario Forever game. But both the flash version and the other one suck, and disappoint me.

But I'll just talk about this one. My very major complaint is the fucked up controls. Who the hell uses Z to jump?! Usually it's the other way around, you know, the button before jump is run. Speaking of running, there is not absolute way to move any slower, or faster. Seriously, it takes time to get used to the crappy controls.

The jumping works okay, but the gravity is too fast. You go into the air too fast, and fall too fast. When I played the first official Mario game, that never did that to me.

Graphics are really nothing much to complain about. It's clear that it was ripped from the SNES version of Super Mario Bros. 1, but there are still things that get on my nerves.

Take the bricks for example. If you destroy them with your head, they don't shatter into pieces, oh no. Instead, it just gravitates towards the air and falls off the screen. What happened? Did the brick slip off the cement?

Also, there's some serious problem with the fire flower. Whenever you throw a fireball at an enemy half of Super Mario's height (when he has the mushroom), it often bounces off the ground and deliberately AVOID the enemy. That's some serious handicap.

The physics are almost as if this game should've been put in the context of SMB3 or Super Mario World. It's pretty slippery and you start running too fast. I would REALLY apprecciate it if running could be done with the Z button, but no, there is no way to move any slower.

And let's talk about the Bowser boss fight. Who would think to stomp on him? In the first Mario game, you have to either get the axe behind him, or pelt him with fireballs for fun. But stomping on him can go against any instincts of a Mario fan. And stomping on Bowser is no easy thing. If he ever jumps, or becomes invincible for a second, you are prohibited from attacking him. Otherwise, YOU get hurt or killed.

When I played the downloadable version, it really frustrated my younger childhood, and still pisses me off today. Why? Because the 7th world is impossible.

I'm trying my least to be a jerk, but I'm baffled how most people are missing out the real bad aspects of this game. I just can't lie. This game (probably) sucked back then, and sucks forever.

Recent Audio Reviews

Grobsmacker Grobsmacker

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Epic Win

This music is an Epic win. Too bad those bastards complaining about CW.

[RG] Suspicions [RG] Suspicions

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

This music is cool

This one is cool, and don't know if there is music like that in Wall Street Massacre.

Ritheguardian responds:

It is my song in wall street massacre... it's right at the beginning of the game after you press start :P

Calliope Calliope

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

I like the music in MC6

I just like the music in MC6, and got to but the loop track in MC6 cant be downloaded =O

Recent Art Reviews

T3h Mike T3h Mike

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars

You didn't draw any of them

You used sprites to make an art picture, if you really want to make an art submission, make sure you draw everything by yourself.

So DO NOT use sprites for art, this is not Flash Portal! This is Art Portal.

People find this review helpful!
aolko93 responds:

i know

Life of Ankh Life of Ankh

Rated 4 / 5 stars


They were simply drawn, maybe add more details on it, and better quality in thr picture. It's probably scribbled with a pen and crayons.

walterwagner responds:

pencils PENCILS and pens

3D cactus 3D cactus

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

It's good.

But it doesn't look much of a cactus. On the top of it, I think there was a bottle cap.

Anyway, it's a good start!

Fineas responds:

the top is the flower. most cactuses have them.